Epic Updates 68: Harvest Moon: the Tale of Two Towns

I'm baaaaaaaaaaaack! So sorry for my inexplicable absence, it's... inexplicable. BUT I GOT MY GAME!!!!!! Finally! YAYNESS! Well, actually I've had it for what, nine days already, but who cares! Well, you might care. BUT! It's so much fun. Basic premise, There are two towns, animal loving, European-style Bluebell, and crop centered, Asian-styled Konohana. Seperating them is a mountain. Running underneath the mountain is a tunnel that connects the two towns. One day, the two mayors were in the tunnel when they started arguing about whose cooking was better. The Harvest Godess (yes she's back, just with out her working force of little gnomes) got so mad at them that she caved the tunnel in. Your job is to help the towns become friends again by winning cooking contests. I started in Bluebell, but I really think your first year should have been spent in Konohana, just cuz it's easier to make money. THERE ARE WINTER CROPS IN THIS GAME, or so I've heard. WTF is up with that? IT'S FRIGGEN WINTER DARN IT! But it's fun to run up the mountain and pick up ALL SORTS OF GOODIES. You can catch fish with your bare hands in the shallow waters, which is KEWL. Easy cash just swimming around. There are ziplines, slides, and bouncy mushrooms too. Raul, Diego, and Enrique are back, Raul runs the store in Konohana, and the other two in Bluebell. The heart system has been replaced with flowers that grow up the side of your text box. There's also the dating feature which is FUN! Just like burning almonds with a propane torch is FUN. Anyways, here are the bachelors:

From left to right, we have Ash, Cam, Dirk, Hiro, Kana, and Mikhail. SO HERE WE GO. Ash. He's just meh. Kinda boring. He takes care of the animals his mother sells in Bluebell. He's nice, I guess, I don't really know. I've talked to him, like what? TWICE? Cam. Oh my god, Alexis I DON'T GET IT!!! All he fricken talks about is FLOWERS. I mean really how girly is that! And he doesn't smile! Well unless you give him a gift, which really dumb. He is kinda cute though. Moving on. DIRK!!! WHY THE HECK ARE YOU HERE! What happened? Are you cheating on the Grand Bazaar me?! (I married him in Grand Bazaar) Arrrrgh! HIRO ID MAH HERO!!! Eeeeee, he's so cute! Alexis thinks I'm pedo-ing, but he's soooooooooo sweet! And he uses BIG words, like PLEASURABLE and CONVERSE. He finds it PLEASUREABLE to CONVERSE with me. xD You know what I've always wondered? Why the word big is such a small word. I mean, small is a longer word than big! Same with TALL and SHORT? WUWT? Anyways, I <3 Hiro. I have him up to BLUE FLOWER!!! Next, is Kana. Sam would love this dude. ALL HE TALKS ABOUT IS HORSES!!! OMG it's Hayate this and Hayate that. And what kind of name is Hayate? I named my horse SAMICH. xD Regardless, he is~ pretty. xD ERGO *von Karma snap* I have him at PURPLE FLOWER!!! Mikhail I can't judge yet cuz I haven't met him. xD But he looks stupid.

YOU CAN HAVE ALPACAS IN THIS GAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wheee! I named my stuffed one CARL. xD And I heard the you get an owl at some point. So... how's about a list of random achivements?

• Hiro at Blue Flower
• Kana at Purple Flower
• 2 cows, 2 sheep, 2 chickens, 1 chick pending
• Summer 16
• Have orange wonderful
• Caught King Snapper Turtle
• Have about three hearts in town friendship
• Have 1 dog, 1 cat, 1 big dog and the starting pony

I think that's about it. xD BYE!!!